On Friday, July 25 I would have been married for 33 years. I write this because I want all the sympathy everyone has to offer, much like someone posting a vague book update or a hospital selfie with a caption that reads, “Please don’t ask, just prayers.” Actually, I’m writing this because I cannot believe […]
There’s got to be a better name for it! Aging. I am cautiously, apprehensively, approaching 50 and the conundrums of a half century plague my thoughts. The first, how could I possibly be 50? My mother is 50. The streaks of silver hair that run through my bangs, the saggy, wrinkled skin wrapped around my […]
My father-in-law died. Our relationship has been nonexistent in recent years. After Peter died, my in laws seemed uninterested in most aspects of mine and my children’s lives. The less I talked to them the more the pain of our disintegrated relationship stung. I vacillated between praying to sky daddy that we could repair our […]
I am an only child; I have always been an only child. My mother wanted more children but to her dismay, it never happened for her. When people find out I am an only child, two things happen, first their face contorts into an ugly, confused shape, second, they say, you don’t seem like an […]
“Am I too old to do coke?” I mumbled the question to my friend Joe. “What, Love?” He says, taking a long drag from his cigarette, as he is perched on the edge of his picnic table. “Am I too old to do cocaine?” I mumbled again, ashamed I am even asking this question. “What? […]
I was eight when it happened the first time. My mother was gone and I was alone with Asshole. He brought me down our hallway to my mom’s bedroom. I don’t remember him taking off his clothes but somehow the next time I looked at him he was naked lying on top of the maroon […]
HERE A PIC, THERE A PIC, EVERYWHERE A DICK PIC. I’ve started dating, oh joy! I have joined Ok cupid, a free online dating site. I have never been on a dating website, there was never a need. I’m ready, I say to myself. I’m not ready, I say even louder. I ask my therapist […]
When I was in high school, there were a few people that I aspired to be. I had hair envy, I had body envy. But there was only one person who gave me brain envy. Her name was Valerie Veerman and she was the smartest person, I knew and usually the smartest person in the room. We were in […]
All of my life I have been told I was too much. When I was a child, a teacher sat me down and told me I was too aggressive because I punched a girl that had turned my last name into Walrus instead of Wallace. During my childhood I was told by several adults that I was too confrontational, […]
I think my daughter is trying to kill me. It’s not a murderous rage or even a sly plot take my life, it’s a slow continuous break down of me, my person. It’s only fair that she’s trying to kill me as I tried to kill my mother when I was fifteen. She’s not killing […]
lifeinthewidowhood 